50 Things — Counterpoint

By Allyson Larcom '17

Everyone talks about the infamous “50 things” list at Wellesley. In four years here, many of us have checked off a lot of those quintessential Wellesley adventures. A few of us have really done all fifty. All of us, however, have had many, many adventures that don't appear on that famous list. As I leave this place, I decided to make a list of my own, featuring a few of the things I’ve done that aren’t featured (and probably shouldn’t be featured) on the official 50 things list. Without further ado, here's my personal list:

50 Things I Probably Should Not Have Done Yet Nonetheless Do Not Regret

1. Attended an “alt-Naked Party” with maybe twenty people in someone’s Claflin single
2. Got a Tinder
3. Deleted Tinder, only to download Tinder again
4. Streaked barefoot across Sev Green during the infamous Snowpocalypse of 2015
5. Brought a prospie tunneling
6. Had a “lightsaber fight” in Lulu with umbrellas
7. Found two half-finished bottles of liquor in the Sustainable Move-Out bins and finished them off
8. Fell deeply in love with a straight girl—lather, rinse, repeat
9. Took several midnight beach trips
10. Went to New York City for a whole day during finals week to see a play
11. Convinced my best friend from another school to come to Remix with me by telling her that it was “a really fun, chill party”
12. Stopped and petted most of the dogs I met without asking their owners first
13. Attempted to use an at-home waxing kit
14. Developed a strong affinity for Irish coffee while abroad
15. Went out to dinner with my family at the end of the day on Marathon Monday
16. Became a regular at the Soldiers Field Road IHOP
17. Helped someone house sit for a drug dealer
18. Got a little too rowdy at Bingo Night
19. Dropped raw bacon on the ground in front of the Shakes Haus, but cooked and ate it anyway
20. Hid out in the library after closing time and stood on top of the tables at 3AM
21. Got lost in the Science Center at 1AM playing Sardines
22. Got high with a friend and ordered all the appetizers from both Shanghai Tokyo and Lemon Thai, ate everything
23. Convinced a friend to go to the Guinness Storehouse in Dublin
24. Performed a hex by burning a piece of spam in the Lulu fire pit
25. Kept referring to a mouse in a Brookline bakery as “my mouse friend” and going back to visit when I should have regarded it as a health code violation
26. Accidentally crashed a stranger's 32nd birthday party in Boston
27. Gave pizza to a stranger outside Machine
28. Got punched in the face at Machine
29. Worked at Gusto!
30. Tried to feed Doritos to one of the campus raccoons
31. Went to The Burren on St. Paddy’s Day and complimented a stranger’s boobs in the bathroom
32. Got overly-invested in a Norwegian teen drama
33. Let a complete stranger on Snapchat (username Daddy) call me “my Irish queen”
34. Put an inflatable couch on Lake Waban
35. Thesised
36. Let my mother meet my friends
37. Started texting all my friends in the style of Scottish Twitter
38. Didn’t check my email for six days (wait a minute, I definitely regret this one...)
39. Used the phrase "Jug O' Sang" to refer to large bottles of sangria
40. Poured six shots of espresso in a cup and drank it all
41. Suggested I’d be attracted to the anthropomorphized version of the Government Center T Stop
42. Fought the geese
43. Went to Dirt Party
44. Started a Yik Yak fight by posting a shitpost claiming Kim Bottomly’s real name was “Swamp Bottom”
45. Memorized John Mulaney's "OOH DUCKLINGS!" bit with my little (we can recite it like the twins from the Shining)
46. Had an El Table tab of over $100
47. Never learned how to do layout for Counterpoint (sorry, Roz!)
48. Wrote 100 pages of fanfiction in 8 days
49. Told a story about nipples so bad I can now make people leave the room by just mentioning it
50. Wrote out this list of 50 things and shared it publicly with the entire campus

From May 2017 Issue